Thursday, January 7, 2010

I'm Relaxed and ALIVE!

Photo: "Photog on road"

You know, relaxing is weird. It's like being on this never-ending high of nothing-ness--just random thoughts going through your head--in one ear out the other type stuff. Man, I've been on vacation since getting back from my assignment in South East Asia, and ever since then I've been doing absolutely NOTHING!

I've been waking up every morning with this eery feeling--hard to explain--but it's like that feeling you get when you arrive late for work and you just know someone's watching. Or you know--that feeling you get when you order three pieces of chicken but when you get home and open your box you see not three but FOUR? Yeah, that feeling exactly! Guilt! It's scary because I feel this way even though I'm on vacation and I'm not even supposed to be at work! Lately, it feels like I have NO life. I'd wake up, have breakfasat, do my daily excercises, take my vitamins and all of a sudden I'd be lost--dazed and confused like I'm some sort of hobo looking for a train to catch.

I dunno, having just returned from a big assignment and being constantly on the move--and then all of a sudden be on lock-down is mind boggling to me! I feel like I should be at some insanity hospital--or whatever they call it. Or maybe I should just find some petty crime to commit just to get some excitement in my life. I dunno man...but all I know is that I'm pumped for my next assignment. I can't wait to get out there and start shooting again! Grrrrr!!!

Damn, I sound like some psycho maniac that hasn't seen daylight since Al Gore invented global warming! Speaking of global warming--I dont know about you, but it's freakin' cold in Michigan! Global warming my **s.

Blogger note: Currently packing gear for next assignment. Next post will be from the road again.

13 comments:

Cheryl said...

YES LOVE THIS. WRITE LIKE THIS MORE OFTEN. THIS IS YOU.

not that other fake crap.

Vera said...

I know how you feel, Ron. I feel depressed and horrid when I have nothing to do, and my mind sort of keeps spiralling away with itself. But these times, curiously, do recharge the batteries, ready for the off.
I like that you charge off with these words, but I also like the other writing you do. It means that you are a gregarious writer, never writing in the same mode all the time, which keeps a reader interested. It means that you are a natural writer, rather than a writer who writes by format.

Deboshree said...

When you love something so much and have been doing it so diligently, life is bound to seem empty without it.
Your work is your passion and love..so go ahead and enjoy!
Sometimes breaks like this are necessary to realise the value of what you are doing.

Have a great n exciting assignment ahead my dear.

Love
Deboshree

Javier said...

Man, it's like in The Shawshank Redemption, inmates that have been doing time for too long become "institutionalized" and when they're freed they feel this terrible nothingness and fear and want to be back into the prison...

Wander to the Wayside said...

Hmmmm. This is kind of like 'the grass is always greener on the other side' isn't it? When you're on the road, you envy those of us who are at home having a 'normal' life, but, when you're at home having a normal life, you yearn for the return of the life of a photo-journalist nomad?

How about during those times that you're home and bored, you turn it into a photo op and do what you do on the road...document thru photographs what life is like around you? I'm not talking just trees and cool buildings, but of the people who are walking around trying to live a normal life while struggling thru this tough economy, working two jobs or no job at all. If you have a local ghetto or low income district, take a drive or walk and compare their living conditions with those of some of the photographs you have shown us of less wealthy countries. Or more upbeat photos of just your area, which I'm not fortunate enough to travel to see (Canada?).

I'm just sayin'...your home base may seem ho hum and same old/same old to you, but to me, here in Ringgold, Georgia, it might be like a feature on the National Geo channel!

Safe traveling on your next assignment and journey...enjoy the ride and the adrenalin, but keep the normalcy and warmth of the homefront inside you. Looking forward to your next post!

Javier said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Javier said...

Ron, I just read your comment on my blog from December, 29th! I don't know how I didn't see it before. Thanks for your answer on how you make the "LOMO" effect on your pics.

Cheers, my friend!

PS: What a pity I didn't read the comment before, because I've repainted that tryptich cause I didn't like it... and now I like it even less haha!

here: http://javierlabanca.blogspot.com/2010/01/champ-47b.html

The Rambler said...

Great photo!!

And maybe you should have some bon bons in your lap and maybe it won't feel so boring :)

I dunno....but as always, thanks for capturing that guilt on paper and reminding me of that feeling :)

ENJOY your relaxing time. Got it?!

:)

xoxo

Sarah, The New Girl said...

sounds like how I feel every time there's a break between school semesters. SO excited that school is starting Monday because I've run out of small projects to work on :) It's nice, though; makes you appreciate the work you love!

Julie said...

there's alot of talent contained in these blog pages that I am really enjoying. Thanks for sharing your work with us...

For me it's the heightened awareness of your surroundings while out and about looking for the next shot opportunity...that's hard to turn off and on, if you are really good at it "seeing" an opportunity anyway...getting the shot requires quick thinking and movement...I love the rush...

Maybe it's not quite guilt, but a void of activity, sights and sounds...I find meditation a solace in between all the buzz, rush, and activity... a genuine recharging of the mind in prep for the next outing...

I kind of suck at it, but try anyway and but the deep breathing seems to quiet the mind even if I find it difficult to stop the rapid fire thoughts...

Stay warm in Michigan...here's to hoping your next assignment leads you to somewhere warm, sunny and colorful.

chemist said...

Ron:

Well, you and I have another thing in common - I too am getting ready to start another trip. Groan! I just dread the security hassles that lie ahead (get to the airport three hours EARLY!!) and the interminably looong flights. Yuk! Hope your trip goes well.

By the way, what type of lens is that pictured in the photo of you on the road?

Traveling Chemist

floreta said...

well you know hobo stands for homeward bound right? :)

Anonymous said...

What a great resource!