Monday, February 22, 2010

Shadows of Fate

Photo by: D2 Photography

Sometimes, I wonder if I'm the person I was born to be, if the life I've lived really is the one I was meant to, or if it is some half life--a mutation engineered by fate, cobbled together by the will to live.

In my life, I've seen beauty. I've seen the sun paint the desert, the ocean ebb and flow to the sound of crashing waves in the distance, the rise and fall of water and rain. I've seen places I can't pronounce, people I'll never forget, horror I wish I hadn't. I've seen it all, yet never enough.

There are times in my life when it all happens too fast, when the winds of change casts doubts on the road ahead, when wrong becomes right and nothing is left. There are times when I look at myself and see not the man I am, but the boy I once was--and I smile. And there are times when I'd see nothing at all. Mere shadows of fate glistening off the contours of my soul.

Sometimes, I stand alone, lost, waiting for something I cannot define in words--but rather, in rays of light. Most times, it finds me before I find it--and within the blink of any eye, we dance to the tune of a camera's shutter, of strobing lights and sweaty palms--and for a fraction of a second, I'm able to see myself, yet again. When I am lost, only my pictures define my existence.

In reflection, maybe some questions aren't meant to be answered--but just accepted. Maybe the life I live is merely the life of someone else, but borrowed. Maybe...

10 comments:

Wander to the Wayside said...

"Maybe the life I live is merely the life of someone else, but borrowed." Uh, no, I'm pretty sure it's YOUR life, and a damn fine one at that, and one to be embraced and proud of.

I saw the photo at Dan's, and said that it was fitting, considering that the photographer is many times a phantom figure behind the 'story'. Love it!

Dan said...

Powerful post, friend. Thanks for the honor of being part of it.

Dan

Deboshree said...

I wonder what brought this...

No one is ever sure, are they? Everyone is following a path they think is the best. But I doubt everyone is 100 percent sure.
All I can say is that life is unpredictable, as you surely must be knowing. One moment your heart is so bloody sure of everything and the next moment, all the grounds on which you formed your ideas seem shaky. That's life babe.

But this much I can say-
Whatever you are today Ron..you have done a damn good job of it! And I'm verrry proud of you!
You're pictures define you, the way you see the world and believe me, it's beautiful. You're a beautiful soul and I'm thankful to have met you.

The "maybe" part, none of us can answer. And yes, we have to just accept things sometimes.

I hope you meet many more people who touch you heart and have many more experiences which enrich you.

Loads of love!!
Deboshree

Linda Lim said...

Bro, you sound adrift... you need a gf, wife and kids...and in that order please.

Vera said...

You are still creating the person you are going to become. You have years in which to do this. You are a sum total of all that you have been. Therefore you are. And for those times when you 'aren't'. Stay quiet within yourself, and be confident that you will soon be who you are meant to be. x

Katherine said...

Ron I don't know you personally but through your blog you have shared with slices of your life & an insight to who you are as a person. You have allowed us to see the world through your eyes, by capturing thought provoking & very honest images. These photos would not have been possible without 'YOUR' vision.

A degree of soul searching, which is what you are doing, is normal. I believe it keeps us honest & true to ourselves, which is a very good thing.

Your life is 'your' own story. It is a succession of chapters. You are young and have many more chapters to write. This is something to be very excited about.
I also believe that the changes in the wind you speak of are valuable 'Life Lessons'... they serve a purpose! Everything that happens in our life, good & bad, brings with it valuable lessons. These lessons make us a better person & improve our character. At least this is what I believe.
As an outsider, looking in, I see an amazing young man living an amazing life. That is something you should be very proud of!

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Lorna said...

You know, I hope you write a book someday. Filled with your photos, embellished on each page with your thoughts. You have such a creative gift, and that you share it with the world is the highest honor. You give through your pictures, your words, your work, your blog. Peace my bloggie friend.

Young Traveler said...

Simply beautiful.

Eva said...

You capture a lot of how I have been viewing life lately. I think there are a million questions and very few answers. This whole piece was brilliant.