Photo By Ron Sim: Off The Coast of Nias Island, Indonesia Current Location: Jakarta, Indonesia 6°12′45.61″S - 106°52′23.74″E
I have to admit: having seen so much of the world has made me less intrigued by the suffering that I so desperately try to capture. Being in a third world country is beginning to feel natural. The people I meet, the images I capture and the plight I witness are all starting to look the same--a constant recycling of events from one country to another—and I think, because of that, I’m no longer emotionally touched as I once was. Lately, I’ve been debating whether my desensitization of the world I see is normal, whether that feeling I feel is right or wrong. It’s a battle that rages in my heart, erodes my soul and wakes me in the midst of a midnight dream.
Sometimes, when I’m awake, I lay there in bed, playing back in my mind the images I’ve captured. A close up of a hand in prayer, the smile of an elder, or the smirk of a lonely child peeking out the window all play back in slow motion replays—and sometimes I can even hear them, recall their words and remember the ambiance of the moment. And most times, I just lay there and smile.
I smile. I laugh to myself and I feel joy knowing that some how, I’ve managed to capture more than what is already evident. In the developing world, it’s easy to see suffering, to see poverty and despair—it can rip through your heart within seconds, tear away at the very fabric of your soul. The hardest part is to look beyond that--to see love and life and happiness and laughter.
But just before I close my eyes again, the image of their suffering hasn’t even flickered in my mind. But to be honest, I hope it never does. Desensitized, I know. I like being at peace.
There’s so much beauty here that it out weighs everything else.
7 comments:
It's understandable, and it's best when beauty out weighs, because you can find both poverty and beauty every where and in the same place but not everyone is lucky enough to see the beauty. Thank you for sharing, love the photo.
I live in a third world country and I've become desensitized. It's my defense mechanism. If I don't feel so bad about the less fortunate people, I won't have to feel guilty that there is nothing I can do to help them. It's not noble, I know.
I understand your doubt, and I share your feeling... Argentina is a third world country, but Buenos Aires is a mixture of all the good and bad things in the world, and one gets used to seeing little fellows sleeping under cardboard boxes on the street while a BMW rolls by with a businessman talking on the cellphone... you get used to it... we all get used to everything, we couldn't live otherwise, we'd die of desperation...
see you, Ron!
Feeling desensitized is the best defense mechanism our body needs to bear the pain or go through life without being defeated by it.
You are right, there is beauty even in the most depressed part of the world. It outweighs the ugliness we see. That's nature's way of desensitizing us.
Who doesn't love feeling at peace?
I hope you're having a good time, Ron!
(I'd leave you a longer comment, but I talked to you 2 days ago, and nothing has changed except now I've got a flu and food poisoning. It's pretty awesome).
amazing... just to see what u see.. would love to share that one day. Your life and experiences are blessings!!
You are so deep. And in honor your deepness, I have given you an award. Check out my blog for details. Enjoy your travels.
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